Monday, January 29, 2007

Push-Pop’s Inventor Introduces New Website

Never in the history of shameless self promotion has something so awesome been talked about so incessantly. Blog Soop , the latest offering from Douglas Cress—inventor of the Push Pop, has gone live.

Blog Soop provides easy access to restaurant reviews generated by 'food bloggers'. The website is currently focused on its search offering. Blog Soop Search connects visitors to nearly 5000 detailed NYC restaurant reviews by the leading experts—food bloggers. It is expected to fundamentally change the way people find and choose restaurants.

Blog Soop - Food Blog Restaurant Reviews

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Intergalactic Forcefield Leaves Toilet Paper Holder Unusable, Investigators Baffled

NEW YORK, NY--(PR NEWSWIRE)-- An invisible force field has materialized in the bathroom of an Upper East Side office building. The spherical orb is completely impenetrable and occupies the space surrounding the bathroom's toilet paper holder. Police officers responding to a panicked 9-1-1 call were left bewildered. A team of scientists has been monitoring the situation closely.

The force, at first believed to be Terrorist generated, may be caused by a tear in the space-time continuum. Niel Bore, an experimental physicist and first responder, discussed the rarity of such an event with NY 1,"The chances of an impenetrable force field appearing in such a small, localized area are simply staggering. Tears in the fabric of space only occur alongside an extraordinary cosmic event - such as the collapse of a super massive star or the explosion of a galaxy." Professor Bore believes the force field may be connected to a black hole millions of light years away.

Office workers, unable to use the toilet paper holder, have begun leaving the toilet paper on a nearby sink. "At first I though my coworkers were just being lazy," said Douglas Cress, employed at the office since 2004. "I mean, it only takes 2 seconds to put the TP on the holder."

The UES toilet paper shortage of 2006 is believed to be unrelated to the incident.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Hardcore Grain Series Part 1: Be afraid, be very afraid.

I am to whole grains what Robert Parker is to wine. Most people stop at oatmeal having exhausted what little grainbition they have. I pity you. There is a universe of grains only waiting to be unearthed. Satisfying, wholesome, delicious. Served hot or cold, cooked or raw. The grain is my god and I am here to spread his word.

Last week, while in a health food store on 84th and 3rd I came across Roman Meal's Cream of Rye. It was sitting on the top shelf in the grain section. A thick layer of dust covered the cylinder. I felt like I was uncovering a lost relic. And it carried a hefty price tag - $4.29. Was this the Cadillac of grains?

Eating this uncooked is suicide. Even when properly cooked (I use a microwave) the grain never seems done. Nuke some sticks or twigs in water for a few minutes, you'll end of with something comparable to whole grained flaked rye. The taste? Earthy, grainy, and slightly nutty. Its okay.

The nutrition facts are admirable. In 1/3 of a cup there are only 110 calories and 5 grams of fiber. Before I was initiated, I cooked up an entire cup. I felt like the roman soldier ran me through with his long sword. I have yet to recover.

When it comes to whole grains this is about as hardcore as you get. The Roman Centurion on the label should have served as proper warning: DO NOT EAT MORE THAN ONE SERVING AT A TIME. If you're new to the world of grains, I would hold off on Roman Meal into you've developed more of a tolerance.